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This is a j-o-k-e
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Lassie
Psychopath


Joined: 20 Mar 2006
Posts: 336
Location: Dublin

PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 12:14 am    Post subject: This is a j-o-k-e Reply with quote

Why don't oysters give to charity?
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Gary Coleman
Site Admin


Joined: 04 Feb 2006
Posts: 608

PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 12:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

shellfish?


If shellfish is the answer we're having you banned.
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Kelly
Moderator


Joined: 31 Jan 2006
Posts: 2486
Location: Manchester

PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 1:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

What's blue and fucks old ladies?
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Kelly
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Joined: 31 Jan 2006
Posts: 2486
Location: Manchester

PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 2:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

(insert name here) in his or her lucky blue coat.


That is the best joke ever. I acknowledge Mike in it
s telling.
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Lassie
Psychopath


Joined: 20 Mar 2006
Posts: 336
Location: Dublin

PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 10:47 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I guess I'm banned then.
Anyone want to give me taxi fare out of here?
This is how the Littlest Hobo got started you know...
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Lassie
Psychopath


Joined: 20 Mar 2006
Posts: 336
Location: Dublin

PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 10:49 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Before I go:
What's long and smelly?

The dole queue



I'll get me coat...
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Kelly
Moderator


Joined: 31 Jan 2006
Posts: 2486
Location: Manchester

PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 11:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think Lassie should stay - she redeemed herself with the dole queue one.
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Gary Coleman
Site Admin


Joined: 04 Feb 2006
Posts: 608

PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 8:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Whats got 80 legs and smells of piss?

The front row of the Terry Wogan show

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?

Give it a blowjob.

How do you get a nun pregnant?

Fuck her.
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Lassie
Psychopath


Joined: 20 Mar 2006
Posts: 336
Location: Dublin

PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 8:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kelly wrote:
I think Lassie should stay - she redeemed herself with the dole queue one.

Thank you Madam, I'm tempted to keep going but I should probably quit while I'm ahead
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Lassie
Psychopath


Joined: 20 Mar 2006
Posts: 336
Location: Dublin

PostPosted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 5:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Except I just can't help myself.

What should you never ask in a gay bar?
Do you mind if I move your stool.
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sheilaaaa
Stupid Kid


Joined: 26 Feb 2006
Posts: 36
Location: cardboard box under a bridge

PostPosted: Mon Apr 10, 2006 8:19 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

hahaha

I am crap at remembering jokes...but here goes...

a woman walks into a bar and asks for a double entendree...





....






...










...










...







so the barman gives her one!






*sits by the door with lassie*
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you smell like a 10p mix
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arunciblespoon
Teenage Punk


Joined: 08 Feb 2006
Posts: 695
Location: under a car

PostPosted: Mon Apr 10, 2006 12:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

a blind man walks into a bar

ow
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sultans of shite, more like
Big landies nnnand cats arses.
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Kelly
Moderator


Joined: 31 Jan 2006
Posts: 2486
Location: Manchester

PostPosted: Mon Apr 10, 2006 3:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

For a long time this was my favourite joke:

A man walks nto a bar with a pastie strapped to his head.
He orders a pint of bitter, the bar man notices the pastie and gives him a strange look, but gets his bitter anyway.
He pays and waits for his change, the barman can't resist and asks "I hope you don't mind me asking but whay have you got a pastie strapped to your head?"
The man shrugs and explains "Oh this? I always wear a pastie on wednesdays"
The bar man says "But today is Tuesday Sir"
The man runs out looking horrified screaming "Oh I must look ridiculous"
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Pippa
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Joined: 03 Feb 2006
Posts: 1862
Location: Manchester

PostPosted: Mon Apr 10, 2006 7:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This one used to slay me anmy friends when were a great deal younger than now...

What do you call a singer with a biscuit on his head?












Lionel Rich-Tea


Sorry Wink
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Eat natural foods, bathe twice daily,
Fill your nostrils up with gravy.
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turnipfish
Stupid Kid


Joined: 11 Mar 2006
Posts: 34
Location: the bottom of the sea

PostPosted: Wed Apr 19, 2006 10:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

a paki was trapped in a corner by 3 bnp suporters,they told him they would let him roll a dice,if you get a 1,2,3,4 or 5 they said then we will beat you to death,by now he was shitting himself and asked rather weakly wwwwhat if i get a 6????


well they said if you get a six you get another turn.

sorry im not actually a racist but it did tickle me fancy.

love you.xx
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all the other fish they dont understand,
the sultans of ping are my favorite band,

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